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Home For Brides Bridesmaid Duties

Bridesmaid Duties

Your bridesmaid is not always your best friend ... but she will become your confidant, your coordinator, and your saving grace when the stress of planning your wedding becomes unbearable.

It is important that you do not feel obliged or pressured into choosing a bridesmaid that you know will not be able to support you in the weeks leading up to the wedding as well as on the day. By now you know your friends, and understand both their strengths and their weaknesses. If you think a friend will be more concerned with her own hair and dress, or can not operate under the slightest pressure, then you definitely do not want her to be part of the planning process. She will make a great guest so let her know how special she is by seating her near to you.

By the same token do not choose a bridesmaid purely on whether her looks or dress will compliment you or look good on your wedding photos. Also avoid choosing someone that you know is too busy at work to be of any significant help before the wedding. Often you as the bride will get to decide on more than one bridesmaid. Ensure that each one has a clear understanding of their role and what is expected from them. The title of Maid of Honour is given to the oldest bridesmaid and that of Matron of Honour is given to the bridesmaid that is married.

Once you have decided on which bridesmaids to use to make your wedding experience memorable, invite them over and have a meeting to discuss the event, the logistics and the practicalities of the day. Devise a plan of action from the kitchen tea, through to the wedding, and even decide whether there are things you would like them to do once you leave for your honeymoon. You may decide to have a bridal shower or hen party with bridal shower games. Making all these decisions together will add a fun element to the planning process.

The planning does not necessarily have to be stressful so pre-empt any possible hiccups that may disrupt your wedding. Remember at least one of your bridesmaids must be available to help you dress and the others as well as the children can meet you just before you leave for the ceremony. It is never a good idea to have too many people around you as you prepare. Keep in mind that the photographer, hair and make up artist and videographer, as well as their assistants, also have to be in the room with you.

Choose one bridesmaid to be ‘on duty’ at the ceremony, taking your flowers or helping to straighten your veil. She will also have to have a tissue handy ... just in case!

Also remember to consider your budget when deciding on bridesmaids, flower girls, pageboys, confetti girls or ring bearers. Very often you will be responsible for paying for their outfits. It is becoming more accepted that your entourage pays for their outfits, but be aware of embarrassing a friend that may not have the means to do this.

It is also the brides responsibility to establish who will be paying for their hair, make up or accessories.

Organising your bridesmaids and ensuring that they each have a suitable action list, will go a long way to avoid any unnecessary stress, But more importantly, you will have the opportunity to share this special time with special friends!


Norine Victor